Brezhnevism — страница 4

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the so-called anekdotisty. Here's a couple of my favorites - a suitable ending. I believe, to this section on Brezhnevism. Brezhnev, as all the world knows, was fond of hunting, and on one of his hunting excursions he fell into a deep hole, where he was eventually discovered by a bright youngster. Brezhnev told the boy, "Pull me out of here. boy, and I'll confer on you the title of Hero of the Soviet Union." The little chap ran home to get a rope, but when he returned, he had a rather un­usual. tearful request to make. "Uncle Brezhnev," he said, "could you confer it on me posthumously?" "Sure I can. Why?" asked Brezhnev. "Father says, if I pull you out, he*ll kill me!" The other one is a particular favorite of mine. as I

helped in the making of it. The Umpteenth Congress of the Communist Party is in progress, and Comrade Brezhnev is mumbling through his speech. In the gal­lery, some people are craning their necks to see the speaker better. One guy asks the man in front, "Could you move slightly to the right? Thanks. Now could you bend forward a bit? Thanks. No, that's too much..." The guy in front asks in irritation, without turning, "Should I give you my field glasses, perhaps?" "No thanks, I've got my telescopic sight!" End of this story, but there's a sequel. The guy in the back row shoots, misses, is duly apprehended and taken to the KGB for interrogation. There follows the regular KGB routine: strong light in the victim's face, rubber truncheons, who are

your accomplices, the works. This goes on round the clock, and in an unguarded moment in the wee hours of the morning the KGB interrogator asks something straight from the heart: "Look, you ass­hole. how could you miss, with your teiescopic sight and all?" This really hurts. "You try rt yourself, with everybody shoving and pushing, "Let me have a go, no, tet me...'*' This said more about the people's real attitude to­ward the "leader of the Leninist type" than an annual - subscription to Now mir ever could.